There’s a saying in science fiction: you get one free pass; one thing that you’re allowed to just let the audience assume. This could be the existence of the warp drive / replicators in Star Trek or the force in Star Wars.

Here in Turbo, there are really two to start out with: that snails have their own intelligent society and that an accident with nitrous oxide1 could grant super powers rather than death. Sure, we’ll give them that.  But in neither case do they really take it all of the way. Ostensibly, Turbo is set in our world. But then why in the world don’t people react to a super fast snail? Why doesn’t anyone seem to react to how intelligent they seem to be?

And then there’s the third assumption: that a snail could / would / should race in the Indianapolis 5002… If the movie were about a race between animals (cheetahs, falcons, etc), sure. But something about cars racing a snail–I just couldn’t do it. That was the straw that broke the camel of disbelief’s back.

That being said, Turbo had a few genuinely funny moments. The running White Shadow gag was funny and the other snails each had distinct enough personalities. Despicable Me 2 or Monsters University (if that’s still in theaters).

Overall, it’s okay. That’s by far the best I could say. #19 it is.

Ranked: 2013 Movie Reviews

  1. Pacific Rim
  2. Frozen
  3. Iron Man 3
  4. The Croods
  5. Gravity
  6. Thor: The Dark World
  7. Star Trek Into Darkness
  8. Monsters University
  9. Elysium
  10. Ender's Game
  11. Man of Steel
  12. Django Unchained
  13. World War Z
  14. Despicable Me 2
  15. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
  16. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
  17. Parental Guidance
  18. Oblivion
  19. The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones
  20. Beautiful Creatures
  21. R.I.P.D.
  22. Jurassic Park (3D!)
  23. The Wolverine
  24. Oz the Great and Powerful
  25. Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
  26. Jack the Giant Slayer
  27. Warm Bodies
  28. Don Jon
  29. Turbo
  30. G.I. Joe: Retaliation
  31. Pain & Gain

  1. Which is both laughing gas and propellant; for some reason that’s always amused me [return]
  2. Speaking of which, since when is the Speedway surrounded by trees? [return]
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